If Larry Miller thinks it was a stupid comment, it really must have been a stupid comment... and you know where that'll land you...
Greetings to one and all from Ephraim, Utah, on potentially the best Tuesday of all time. I mean, when you wake up at 7:45 and pop right out of bed like nobody's business, without showing the slightest Signs of fatigue, then go to one class, getting out and being completely done for the day at 10:45, you know it's a good day, baby. I'm seriously not even messing around anymore. I mean business. Topics to be discussed today: The Triumphant Return of the Triumphant Return, the Golden Globes, the U of U marching band, rubber bands, the gender guesser, subliminal messaging, YouTube bans, coming on down, and other miscellaneous garbage. On we go!
A-Town got his own office recently. In fact, he spend the majority of the afternoon in his office yesterday! For those unaware, I am on the management staff at the radio station now. I'm the Program Director, so I get to help everyone schedule their shifts. The class size has more than doubled since last semester, so it has been a little crazy - in fact, somebody signed up for the first midnight-to-2AM shift last night. That's crazy. This week we are training the new DJs, so it has been pretty exciting to see some new talent. I predict big things for this semester.
One of the big things set up for this spring is a new show on Monday nights called "The Seven Wonders of Ephraim," featuring my buddies, Duke and Dave. They let me help them out a little bit last night from 8-10 PM on the big debut and I'm afraid that the boys have set the bar one notch higher with what I'm calling "groundbreaking entertainment." "Seven Wonders" is the KAGE's one and only game show, where callers give Duke a jingle and pick a number from one to seven. With each question comes a trivia question and a mystery prize or "Wonder." The show is pretty innovative and I'm digging it so far, if you know what I mean. I am proud to announce that I am officially the first winner EVER on the show! My question was simple - repeat the number for the KAGE request line. I almost got it wrong, too! But after correctly responding, I was awarded with my Wonder - two Tootsie Rolls! Oh man. Seriously, they were probably two of the best Tootsie Rolls I've ever had in my life. Other prizes from last night included a free song request, a water bottle, and a Subway gift card. I'm telling you - groundbreaking entertainment.
Greetings to one and all from Ephraim, Utah, on potentially the best Tuesday of all time. I mean, when you wake up at 7:45 and pop right out of bed like nobody's business, without showing the slightest Signs of fatigue, then go to one class, getting out and being completely done for the day at 10:45, you know it's a good day, baby. I'm seriously not even messing around anymore. I mean business. Topics to be discussed today: The Triumphant Return of the Triumphant Return, the Golden Globes, the U of U marching band, rubber bands, the gender guesser, subliminal messaging, YouTube bans, coming on down, and other miscellaneous garbage. On we go!
A-Town got his own office recently. In fact, he spend the majority of the afternoon in his office yesterday! For those unaware, I am on the management staff at the radio station now. I'm the Program Director, so I get to help everyone schedule their shifts. The class size has more than doubled since last semester, so it has been a little crazy - in fact, somebody signed up for the first midnight-to-2AM shift last night. That's crazy. This week we are training the new DJs, so it has been pretty exciting to see some new talent. I predict big things for this semester.
One of the big things set up for this spring is a new show on Monday nights called "The Seven Wonders of Ephraim," featuring my buddies, Duke and Dave. They let me help them out a little bit last night from 8-10 PM on the big debut and I'm afraid that the boys have set the bar one notch higher with what I'm calling "groundbreaking entertainment." "Seven Wonders" is the KAGE's one and only game show, where callers give Duke a jingle and pick a number from one to seven. With each question comes a trivia question and a mystery prize or "Wonder." The show is pretty innovative and I'm digging it so far, if you know what I mean. I am proud to announce that I am officially the first winner EVER on the show! My question was simple - repeat the number for the KAGE request line. I almost got it wrong, too! But after correctly responding, I was awarded with my Wonder - two Tootsie Rolls! Oh man. Seriously, they were probably two of the best Tootsie Rolls I've ever had in my life. Other prizes from last night included a free song request, a water bottle, and a Subway gift card. I'm telling you - groundbreaking entertainment.
With better talent on the KAGE this semester, I, A-Town, will be pushed to the virtual limit of my creative genius. I gotta look good! I can't let the punks over at "Seven Wonders" show me up every week. Therefore, tonight as I debut my new Season of "City Council," I will do things on the air that people have only ever dreamed of. Namely, bringing back three KAGE Match losers from the previous two Seasons and having them compete in the "Tournament of Champions." That's right, people. This semester won't feature the clever little Matches from previous Seasons, but it will bring back bands that have already won (or in tonight's case, lost) KAGE Matches. Tonight's show will be one of two "wild card" rounds leading up to the ultimate showdown known as the KAGE Match Playoffs in several weeks. Next week I'll put in three bands requested by listeners and in two weeks I will bring back the Champions from Season One and Season Two. Other things you can look forward to this semester include my big show next week on Inauguration Day. I plan on holding the first ever KAGE press conference LIVE and in 3-D to announce something very important. Later on in the Season, I plan on having many special guests, including the two and only Jake and Dave, the hosts of the popular dating show, "The Jake 'n Dave Show," and others, so it will surely be something you don't want to miss.Tune in to the KAGE 89.5 FM online! Visit www.snow.edu/~kage and click on "Listen in Your Player." "City Council" w/ A-Town will air all Tuesday nights from 10PM - midnight and the program formerly known as "Thursday Afternoon" w/ A-Town will be shifted from its previous 4-6 PM timeslot to 6-8 PM on Thursdays. Tune in and LISTEN LIVE! The Police vs. Red Hot Chili Peppers vs. The Presidents of the United States of America! Be there or be absent.
Ok, ok. What's the dang deal with the Golden Globes? I watched it for a little bit on Sunday and had to keep switching the channel periodically because I kept getting blinded by ego. I think the point of these awards shows is just to get as many celebrities in the same room as possible, isn't it? Anyway, pretty much all they do is have some chick in a weird dress get up and read the nominees (most of which are from movies that nobody has every heard of). While she reads them off, the camera cuts to different tables of celebrities (most of which are people nobody recognizes) who just look like they're happy to be there. Then, the winner is announced (usually it's yet another independent or otherwise relatively unknown film) and they get up and say they had no idea that they would ever be nominated for the same thing as Clint Eastwood and that they love their kids who are going to be watching the Globes tomorrow morning before they go to school. What ticked me off the most was when Kate Winslet won an award for something - maybe best actress in a drama or something like that - and immediately showed outburst of shock and emotion like she had no idea that she'd ever win anything in her life. After a few deep breaths and kissing everybody at the table, she made her way up to the stage to make her acceptance speech. Oh yeah, while she was on her way up, she reached into her purse and got out a huge list of people to thank. No idea you'd ever win, huh? Was the list "just in case?" But that's not all - she gets up there and says she has "a habit of not winning things." Uh... wasn't Kate Winslet in "Titanic," which set a record for winning awards? Musta been somebody else, I guess.
**QUESTION TIME!!**
--> This just in from Nicki (Mills) Ortman: (And I quote...) "So, this isn't really a question, but I guess the U of U band has the opportunity to march in the Inaugural Parade, but are currently in need of funds. Maybe you could let people know about this situation. Thanks!" http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,705275621,00.html- Nicki--> Consider it done. I believe you can also donate by accessing http://www.utah.edu/, or, more specifically, https://umarket.utah.edu/development/form.tpl?ckd=4&ID=91781. Good luck!
Q. "Dear A-Town:
I have some questions, each prefaced by a statement:
Q1. I asked you a question a few weeks ago, and you never answered it. What gives?
Q2. Rubber bands seem to come in beige and red (at least the serious ones.) Which ones are better?
Q3. There's this site (http://www.hackerfactor.com/GenderGuesser.html#Analyze) that guesses if you're a man or woman based on a writing sample. Do you know how the last three Issues of 'Signs of the Times' scored?"
All my best,
- Dallin Akagi
A1. Ah crud. (Luke 21:19)
A2. Yes, Dallin. You bring up a very good point. I have noticed this before and had never previously given it much thought. However, let me make a few guesses. I have noticed that the beige ones usually come with the newspaper in the mornings. They tend to be a little less common than their red counterparts. They come in packages of a billion or so and are often fairly cheap, monetarily speaking. It seems to me that they are also frequently thinner and less stretch-resistant than the red ones. The red ones are the real legit ones. They can also be purchased in bulk, but have been harder to find, in my own personal experience. They are a little harder to stretch, making them better for shooting at people. Red rubber bands are more durable and are difficult to break. (Honestly, when was the last time you snapped a red rubber band? If you really think hard about it, I bet the last one that snapped on you was beige.) If we had to put money on it, here at "Signs of the Times" we'd go with the red ones.
Q3. You know, you really kind of scared me with this Question. I was really hoping that I didn't score as a female. So, unless I did something wrong, I believe that I've scored as a male writer for the last three Issues (38-40). It also indicated that there is a possibility of me being European. Depending on how technical you want to get, these guys are pretty dead-on.
Here's your other Question that I failed to recognize last Time:
Q. Assuming you drink soda, do you prefer drinking out of a glass bottle over all other forms? (The correct answer is yes.)"
Your Comrade in the Fight,
- Dallin Akagi
A. Um... yes.
Q. "Dear Aaron,
Has YouTube banned your Trans-Christensen Orchestra video yet?"
Just Curious,
- The Junior Mounties
A. (SALUTE!!) No, not yet. We're up to eighty-one views and zero comments. Hurry up and see it before it's too late! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpmw883OZLo You never know - being the copyright infringer that I am, this movie might be history just like the Big Ticket in no time.
Q. "Dear Aaron,
How much Rock Band is too much Rock Band?"
Just Curious,
- The Junior Mounties
A. Thirteen and a half hours. (SALUTE!!)
Q. "Dear Aaron,
Do you think that CBS intentionally intoxicates their viewing audience before tapings of 'The Price is Right?'"
Just Curious,
- The Junior Mounties
A. Dang, you guys are just full of Questions today, aren't you? (SALUTE!!) Well, if what I saw last Thursday was any indication, the answer, shockingly, is yes. Those contestants are crazy.
Remember - you can submit your very own Questions (which may or may not be answered in a timely manner) by sending them to me at tarheelglory19@yahoo.com or by leaving a comment on the blog at http://www.signsofthetimesnewsletter.blogspot.com/.
It's Time once again for the recurring segment that is taking the Internet by storm - it's The Boo Box! This week the suggestion comes from my dear and loving mother, who asked that Carlos Boozer be put in the Box. Apparently his medical results are in. I've yet to see them, so I won't pretend like I know what they are. But anyway, here's the deal. He's missed about thirty games so far this season with the Jazz due to an apparent bone fracture and some bruises in his leg. Wah wah wah. Paul Millsap has played hurt this season and he's the dang man! Millsap for president! So, by the way, Boozer has talked about opting out of his contract during his time off, too, which pretty much angered the entire Wasatch Front. Lameness. Total lameness. If you're not even playing, don't talk about not playing. Suck it up and get back here or pack your bags and get out. Everybody together now - BOOOOOOOO!!
The Shoutout of the Week this week goes to Mr. Jon Davis, truly a man among men. And really, if anybody has the right to Feel Good About Themself today, other than me, it's gotta be my boy Jonny. Congratulations, Jon. Today is officially not yesterday. Doesn't that bring a smile to your face? Oh yeah, baby.
That's about it for this week. Oh man, doesn't everybody just Feel dang Good About Themselves?
Until next Time,
Move It! Sell It! And Leave the Door Open!
Aaron
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