My name is Aaron and I invented the Internet.
Greetings to one and all on the first day of summer! Somewhere something yeah yeah. Topics to be discussed: the upcoming NBA draft, ridiculous email addresses, a few minor Adjustments, raffle prizes, dogfighting, and my thoughts on global warming. On we go!
The buzz on the streets here in Salt Lake City this week is all about the NBA Draft, which takes place this Thursday evening. The Utah Jazz have the third and the 12th picks in the first round of the draft and it's really anybody's guess as to what they'll do with them. The guys most people are thinking that the Jazz will take are Brandon Knight, a point guard from Kentucky, with the three-pick - but I think we'd take Derrick Williams from Arizona if he's still available after the first two picks - and Jimmer Fredette from BYU with the number 12 pick - though many skeptics doubt the Jazz would take two guards with the picks. I don't know enough about Brandon Knight to form an opinion one way or the other. I don't think the Jazz are in desperate need of a point guard, though. We need a shooting guard or a small forward. A consistent one that can knock down threes. CJ Miles is consistently average and Kyle Korver could knock down threes, but not consistently. We need somebody who can come in night after night and deliver. We've already got three point guards (Devin Harris, Earl Watson, and Ronnie Price) and I don't think we need a new one just yet. I have my days where I think bringing in Jimmer would be good for us. Recently, that's how I feel. As much as I'd hate hate hate to see BYU fans go nuts about drafting him, it could be a good thing for us. Drafting him, that is. Having to tolerate BYU fans freaking out is very rarely a good thing. Anyway... Jimmer's a shooter. Mediocre defense and average athleticism (yes, I'll be awaiting your hate mail, but it's true), but the kid can shoot. I doubt that Jimmer will come on to any team in the entire league and play the way he did in college. You can't play Jimmer Ball in the NBA. You can't. But if he could come off the bench and knock down some shots for us, I think he'd be a great addition. I think a better fit for him would be in Phoenix or New York or possibly Golden State, but I think there's a good chance the Jazz could take Jimmer with the 12 if he's still available.
Who's it going to be??
Working in a call center, I often wonder if people are ashamed of their email addresses. We get some pretty weird ones when people call in. Honestly, I don't really care, but sometimes I just have a hard time not laughing when a customer rattles off their username and email domain. For instance, when an "older" woman calls in and says her email address is "hotmamababe123@whatever.com," I have a hard time taking her seriously after that. If a man calls in and his email address is "toughharleybikerdude69@something.net," it's like... Are you serious, man? And then, of course, there are the cutesy email addresses like "romeolovesjuliet4evrkisses@yeahyeah.org". Puke. Things to keep in mind when registering for your next account...
hottieboi14@youknowwho.gov?? Really??
Today is a happy day for me, not just because it's Tuesday, the king of weekdays, but also because "The Adjustment Bureau" comes out on DVD and Blu-ray today. You can bet your sweet bippy that I went right out and bought that sucker as soon as I got off work. I saw it in theaters three times, for heck's sake. I just love this dang movie. I'm a fan of so-called psychological thrillers like M. Night Shyamalan's early stuff, "Frequency," "Inception," and "The Truman Show." I like movies that make me think and analyze where I am in life and where I'm going in the end. "The Adjustment Bureau" is one such movie. If you're a member of the predominant religion in Utah, and I generally assume that most of you are, you've surely had the agency vs pre-destination vs foreordaination debate one Sunday or another. It's an interesting topic, to be sure, and the Bureau revolves largely around that topic. Are the decisions we make actually our own decisions? Or is there a greater Plan out there being orchestrated for us? Are the things that happen to us in our lives predetermined according to that Plan or are they results of mere coincidence and chance? And if there is, indeed, a Plan for us, are our lives etched in stone, immune to deviation from it, regardless of our own personal actions? Oh man, this movie is awesome and I can't wait to check it out again. Plus, the members of the Bureau are just plain stylish gentlemen. Suits and fedoras are a good look. Ah yeah.
I want to dress like these guys.
As I was driving to WalMart to pick up the Bureau, I flipped to 101.9 The End, one of my favorite local radio stations, during a commercial break on the sports radio station. The song that was playing at the time was "Friday, I'm In Love" by the Cure. You know that one? That song is like a slap in the face to every other day of the week - and not to mention how depressing it was to hear that song on any other day of the week other than Friday. Don't get me wrong - I love Tuesday. I do. But that song should really only be played on Fridays.
I had a request for the That's P.M.U.!! this week. My dearly beloved father suggested that I write about the unhappy-looking Smurf that we recently saw plastered on the door of a local movie theater. We are evidently not experts on the subject, but we can't recall ever seeing a Smurf look that disgruntled. I think it may have been a little like the Care Bears or the Seven Dwarfs or something where they are all really happy except for one sad or angry guy somewhere, but who knows? It was kind of weird. But I have something worse to talk about. So my company, ZAGG, had their summer company party at Lagoon on Saturday. There was a giant raffle drawing where some pretty cool things were given away like TVs, video cameras, laptops, etc. I didn't win anything in the drawing, but all employees walked away with a brand new iPod Nano 6th Gen, which was pretty awesome. There were some prizes left over from the party so the head honchos gave away the rest of them at a company meeting this afternoon. The final prize was an iPad 1. I'm torn on the iPad. In this company, it seems as though everyone has one, so I feel like I need one, too, but I don't know why I would ever want one. Somebody enlighten me, please. I have an iPod, a phone, a laptop, and a Playstation 3. What more could an iPad possibly do for me? But hey - if it's free, I want it. My raffle ticket was number 185. To build the suspense, the master of ceremonies narrowed down the first number - 1. So far so good. The second number was whittled down to 8. 1-8. I had a one-in-ten chance to win it. "What is the last number?" he called. "Four!" "No." "Six!" "No." "Seven! Three! Eight! Nine! Two!" "No, no, no." there were pretty much only two numbers left. One or five. "Five?" I pondered... "It's one." 1-8-1. I was off by four measly numbers. The iPad ended up going to a girl sitting right in front of me. I think it was her first day on the job. Now THAT is P.M.U.!! I hate raffles.
Even looking at these tickets makes me sick.
As I got home from work today, I got out of my car, as I'm so often inclined to do after returning to the humble abode, looked across the street, and saw a little kid walking his dog. I reached back into my car to get my stuff, as I'm so often inclined to do when I have belongings in my vehicle, and by the time I looked up, another large dog was all over the boy's dog, biting, growling, and rolling on top of it. The boy's dog fought back valiantly, but the small child was forced to leap on the two quarreling canines, attempting to force them apart with his brittle body. His screams of "Lucy! Lucy! No!!! Stop, Lucy!!" nearly broke my poor little heart. I just stood there and watched. It was intense. Eventually he broke them up, which was good.
**QUESTION TIME!!**
Q. "Dear Aaron,
What do you think about global warming?"
Just Curious,
- The Junior Mounties
A. Great Question, thank you. (SALUTE!) Well, with today being the first official I believe more and more with each passing day that global warming is total garbage. Isn't it basically the idea that pollution from Earth is burning holes in the Ozone Layer which will eventually overheat our planet? It still feels like March outside. It's the end of June, heading into July and it's still mid-70s outside. When I was in elementary school, I remember it being 140 degrees outside in mid-June. I would come home and positively beg my mom for a Sno-cone... because it was 140 degrees outside!!! If anything, this so-called pollution is HELPING climate control. Since those days, it has snowed habitually through the Spring and occasionally in the summer, including on Austin's birthday (June 30th) one year. This is a fact. Ask Austin. Global warming is not ruining our ecosystems. And even if it was, I wouldn't care. Just a Sign of the Times, people. From what I believe, the world is going to be burned at His coming, anyway, isn't it? It was going to happen eventually.
Different kind of burning.
Finally, let's give out two Shoutouts of the Week to two very deserving and very Loyal Subscribers, Jake Rands and Mike Holmes. Jake likes the Bulls (gag) and Mike likes the Yankees (cough), but they still read the Newsletter week in and week out. Wonderful, upstanding gentlemen. Clearly deserving of recognition. Great work, fellows. Very well done.
That's about it for this week. I now invite you all to join me (figuratively, not literally) as I go to sleep at 10:15 again tonight. I'm telling you. 5:27 AM comes all too early in the mornings.
Until next Time,
Move It! Sell It! And Leave the Door Open!
Aaron
6 comments:
It's summer so going to bed at 10:15 will not be happening for me. That's when the parties start! Well, at least until August when I will also be going to bed at 10:15 again. Haha
That story about the boy and the dog, nearly broke MY heart. Poor kid. Stupid dogs.
Go Mavs! =) That's all I have to say.
And you didn't help the child and the dogs? Where is your heart...
And you posted anonymously? Where is YOUR heart?
...but to answer your question, first of all, I always have the Newsletter in mind. What good would that story be if I had stepped in and broke up that little scuffle? No good at all. Secondly, if you hated dogs as much as I did, you wouldn't have gone anywhere near those rabid beasts, either.
*gasps* What?! You hate dogs?!
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