I can't believe I'm saying this.
Greetings to one and all in the first Issue of "Signs of the Times" in the year of our Lord, 2011. In the new year, I'm hoping for change. Lots of change. As I previously discussed, 2010 wasn't a bad year... It just wasn't a good year, really. Here's to change in the economy, change in our personal lives, and change - yea, improvement - in the Newsletter. Topics to be discussed today: getting lost at sea, Peter Pan envy, the fall of Facebook, and another reason why I'll never be as good as Austin. On we go!
What a better way to start the new year than with The Week in Review? As is tradition, my family and I embarked on a quest to find New Year's Eve entertainment by settling down for America's finest cinema. This year's New Year's Eve movie of choice was the new Jack Black film, "Gulliver's Travels," based on a new interpretation of Jonathan Swift's classic tale. The story follows lovable loser, Lemuel Gulliver, as he rashly impersonates a travel journalist who undertakes an assignment to write a piece about an exotic locale near the Bermuda Triangle. His journey goes awry and he is almost magically transported to the strange parallel universe of Lilliput, home of bite-sized inhabitants called Lilliputians. Due to Gulliver's enormous size, they see him as a monster, but his fortunes eventually shift, making him an all-powerful celebrity of sorts. The movie follows Gulliver's exploits in Lilliput as he rules, reigns, and eventually tries to return home. It's a typical Jack Black film - lots of slapstick humor, sight gags, and Mr. Black only half-dressed. Though there were admittedly parts where I laughed out loud, there were some parts that I found not funny and at times unnecessary. There is a bit of potty humor (literally) that I know many people won't enjoy and there is one scene where Gulliver convinces the Lilliputian general that a profane insult is actually a compliment, repeating the word several times in a one-to-two-minute span. I wonder how many kids went home with a new favorite word after watching that scene... Black's seemingly mandatory song-and-dance routines that appear in almost every single movie he's in are starting to wear on me and the ending to this movie was one of the cheesiest I've seen in a long time. "Gulliver's Travels" gets a 3 out of 10. Unfortunately, I haven't many seen any other movies out there so I don't know what to recommend to you as an alternative.
Black is the new sucky?
As I watched a few scenes of "Gulliver's Travels" and, drawing on a conversation we had on the way to the theater about type casting in Hollywood, I felt a little bad for Jack Black. The poor fellow has been type cast as the loser role in countless movies - long hair, grungy, overweight, unemployed or otherwise hopelessly in search of promotion... He was cast as a rich guy in "King Kong" a few years back, but nobody liked that movie, so we won't discuss it. In my Media and Pop Culture class two semesters ago, we briefly talked about how pop culture has made us a society of babies, reluctant to grow up - and it's true! The thing about Jack Black is that he plays the overgrown teenager is practically every movie and he doesn't seem to mind one bit! People love Jack Black and his childish antics. Consider the movie "Grown Ups" that I didn't see at the end of last summer. I don't know much about it, other than the fact that Adam Sandler and his cronies play a bunch of childish grown ups. Why are marriages failing? Because the media makes it look so much fun to be single! The internet and social networking sites make gossip immediately accessible at all times, confuse seriousness and sarcasm, and have exponentially increased the number of fights between close friends via text and instant messaging. I'm a firm believer that technology is a great thing - I hope to make a living off of it - but I'm also a believer that technology is ruining society. We're forgetting how to communicate and forgetting how to live our lives, bringing us to a state of perpetual childhood and endlessly bad dating stories.
We don't want to grow up.
Speaking of bad dating stories, hmmmph! Do I have a couple?! That is all.
My interest in posting things on Facebook is steadily on the decline. Declining enough, in fact, to put Facebook friends in The Boo Box. I feel like, going back to my beef with social networking sites, I offend somebody with pretty much everything I say nowadays - and not ALL the stuff I say is offensive! I think I started to realize this when the Utes played Boise State. My so-called friends were so happy to see my team lose. Some even mentioned things like that they like to see me squirm and that they didn't want to talk to me after a loss. Keep in mind that only two or three of these people have legitimate ties to Boise State. The others were BYU fans or Utah bashers. I try extremely hard to keep my BYU commentary to myself, considering how many BYU fans I'm friends with, so I don't know why they all love attacking me so much. (Perhaps because they know I'll blog about it if it gets bad enough.) I don't know what the deal is. I just really don't care that much about my Facebook friends anymore. The majority of them are apparently too busy to ever respond when I try to talk to them anyway, so I'm just losing interest in trying to talk to them at all. BOOOOOO!! If you don't plan on chatting with people or responding when people try to talk to you, go offline. It's simple. I'm just trying to be nice, people. Twitter is where it's at, ladies and gentlemen. I can't believe I'm saying that. My chronicled past with Twitter is no small matter. I used to hate Twitter... but now I think I like it more than Facebook. It's funnier, simpler, less annoying, and there are way less pseudo-celebrities clogging your news feed with pictures of them in public restrooms. Heck, if you're my friend (my REAL friend) and you're funny, I'll encourage you to start a Twitter account. It's weird for a week or so, but you'll catch on. I'll help you. And then maybe you, too, like me and Austin, can start using hash tags in your text messages. #clever #changedmymindaboutTwitter #joinus
It's all going down right now.
I'm sure many of you are just waiting to mock me when I struggle with my job hunt - oh wait, no, I unfriended all the people that are waiting to mock me... but anyway, yes, the job hunt has begun again. Currently, Comcast is chomping at the bit trying to get me to set up an interview with them. I got a voicemail from them at like 7:45 in the morning today after speaking with a representative about the same thing yesterday afternoon. They're offering $11.50 an hour plus commission, which is pretty good, compared to all the other minimum wage jobs that are out there. I'm not ready to commit to that right now, though. I'd still love to have a job as a writer or something in the broadcast journalism field, which is what I studied in college. I'm excited by the opportunity to start working. It will be nice to have an income again for the first time since this summer at EFY. Then maybe I won't be so much of a #cheapskate.
The fantasy football season is over and, sadly, I have to award the championship Game Ball to my arch-nemesis, Austin and his team, Christensen Crush. He won the week, scoring more points than any other team, five out of 17 weeks, which is not bad, considering that there were eight teams in the league. That's once every three weeks. Harper Anderson won the week four times, followed by my A-Town Assassins with three week wins. But in the end, nobody was even close to Austin, who ended up nearly 200 points ahead of Harper, who finished in second place for the season. So whatever, I guess Austin deserves it, no matter the hatred that burns in my heart for him. Congratulations to Christensen Crush, this year's fantasy football champion.
This picture says it all. Who is the REAL champ??
The Shoutout of the Week goes to my brother, Adam. He is a rare recipient of Shoutouts, so I think it's probably about time he got another one. Thanks for the Burger King the other day, brother. It was delicious. I hope your new apartment is treating you well. I'll have to come visit again once you're all settled in.
That's about all I feel like whining about this week. I have high hopes for this year. I think it will be a good one. Hopefully you're Feeling Good About Yourselves, as well. If you have any Questions, comments, or requests for something you'd like me to discuss, let me know.
Until next Time,
Move It! Sell It! And Leave the Door Open!
Aaron
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