I've got a fever! And the only prescription is...
Greetings to one and all. My name is Aaron and this is my blog. Well, apparently nobody understood my parable last week. So I figured this week I'd talk about something that everyone can understand - the international language of music! Topics to be discussed today: Five of my favorite CDs of all time, the incredible Sax Man, the coolest instrument for nerds with suspenders, my sneaky publicity, "sweet spirits," sweet chin music, one of the best video games ever, a Manly guest blogger, and the first concert I ever slept through. I mean went to. Right. On we go!
Greetings to one and all. My name is Aaron and this is my blog. Well, apparently nobody understood my parable last week. So I figured this week I'd talk about something that everyone can understand - the international language of music! Topics to be discussed today: Five of my favorite CDs of all time, the incredible Sax Man, the coolest instrument for nerds with suspenders, my sneaky publicity, "sweet spirits," sweet chin music, one of the best video games ever, a Manly guest blogger, and the first concert I ever slept through. I mean went to. Right. On we go!
RollingStone.com just ranked "Is This It" by the Strokes as the second best album of the 2000s. As well as coming as a complete shock to me (I had no idea that the album was so critically acclaimed), this also happens to be one of my favorite CDs from my high school years. I was thinking about some other albums that were instrumental (*rimshot*) in my youth and I've come up with the Top Five CDs that played a role in my younger years. If you want further explanations on any of these, let me know. I'd be happy to discuss. Anyhoo, in no particular order, here they are:
- Weezer, Weezer (Green Album), also Make Believe
- Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band, Greatest Hits
- Three Dog Night, Greatest Hits
- They Might Be Giants, Flood
- Barenaked Ladies, Disc One: Their Greatest Hits
You know what, I don't care what you say. You're probably all upset about me choosing a bunch of "greatest hits" albums, but you know what? When you've got the greatest hits, who really needs anything else?
The best of the best.
One of the best musical experiences I've ever had was during the Olympic closing ceremonies the other night. British nu-wave band, Madness, was performing their one-hit wonder, "Our House," and their saxophone player was dressed in a Union Jack kilt. I left the room momentarily and, once I got back, I noticed that the kilted sax man was flying through the air! I had my family rewind the DVR so I could see what happened and, for some reason, he just lifted off into the sky at one point in the song! It was incredible! I think more bands should feature floating sax players in patriotic kilts. Why has this not caught on until now?
Fly, Sax Man! FLY!!
How about that closing ceremony, though, huh? Other than our DVR having a minor freak-out and missing some of the good acts before Rio came out - and despite CBS cutting The Who - I'd say it was a pretty good musical spectacle. I'm not sure that any other country other than maybe Canada and Mexico would have music I'd be able to sing along with. England has got some good stuff. I enjoyed it. At least it entirely wasn't like the opening ceremony, where my dad, at one point, asked why we couldn't get some Americans out there performing.
Something that has been making a comeback lately is the accordion. There's one popular song on the radio lately, in particular, that prominently features the ol' squeezebox. It's rather annoying, to be quite honest, but it has led to the development of an incredible new A-Town dance move called the Air Accordion. It's a beautiful thing. Apparently my sister, Amy, introduced our father to the fabled Air Accordion yesterday and he wasn't very impressed. I'm guessing he's not interested in seeing my interpretation of the Hair Accordion, either.
For those of you who may not know, back in the glory days, I was the band president of Alta High School. That was like A-Town in embryo, basically. I was coming out of my shy little cocoon and blossomed into the spectacle of a man that I am today. I fought tooth-and-nail to break down the "band geek" stereotype whilst I reigned as champion of the music department - and I think we did a pretty good job. One of the ways I tried to force-feed my high school with band propaganda was by posting fliers on bulletin boards in the hallways. They'd usually be something awesome like, for instance, a picture of a huge ice cream cone with the words "FREE ICE CREAM" running along the bottom of the page. Then, below the large text, it would read (in noticeably smaller font), "Band concert, Tuesday night at 7:00 in the auditorium." It was a masterful marketing campaign. Whether or not people actually came to the concerts (and I imagine that most of them didn't), at least they saw the fliers.
**QUESTION TIME!!**
Q. "Why are people surprised when ugly people can sing? (Susan Boyle)"
- Jordan Holmes
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Q. "Why are people surprised when ugly people can sing? (Susan Boyle)"
- Jordan Holmes
A. That is a great Question! I think that I, to a certain extent, am also guilty of this. I'm a huge fan of "America's Got Talent," the hit NBC TV show, which often showcases ugly, awkward, or nerdy-looking singers. I was completely blown away by last season's winner, Landau Eugene Murphy, Jr., the dreadlocked, African-American car washer with a voice like Sinatra's. Why is it that we are so judgmental toward people who don't look like Michael Bolton or Carrie Underwood? Perhaps our problem is that, when we see someone who is unattractive, we assume that if they can't even take care of their appearance, how could they possibly be able to take care of anything else? We stereotypically discount their potential talents because of their outward appearance. We judge the book by its cover, I suppose you'd say. In some cases, I think we're completely justified - assuming that a beggar on a street corner would not have Olympic-quality athleticism, for instance - but the nice thing (and I've thought this many times as a musician) about being a singer is that you can practice singing pretty much anywhere! It's not like I can just whip out my trumpet and play a little ditty as I take the elevator. You certainly wouldn't practice the drums in the shower. But singers have the unique ability to carry their "instrument" with them wherever they go and they have a lot more opportunities to hone those skills, regardless of whether or not they use Botox or are rich enough to afford name-brand jeans. Another thing that comes into play is our perception of famous singers. It's not likely that some homely-looking person would sell tons of records by having their mug plastered on album covers at the record store, and airbrushing can work wonders, so we aren't accustomed to seeing ugly singers. Due to this brainwashing process, we are led to believe that all singers are attractive and, thus, are shocked when an ugly person has a good voice. (Editor's note: Of course, there are exceptions to my previous rambling. Take, for instance, Michael Lee Rose, who is both ugly AND a terrible singer. Google Images search.)
No offense, but this is a really scary picture.
Just Curious,
- The Junior Mounties
A. Do you ever watch the audition episodes of "AGT" or "American Idol"? There are plenty of attractive people that can't sing. (SALUTE!)
Speaking of "America's Got Talent," the show so beloved by my family is returning tonight after a two-week break for the Olympics. Traditionally, male singers with good backstories have fared very well, often going all the way and claiming the million-dollar prize. There is one former drug addict this year who I believe will make the final show, but I'd be horribly disappointed if he ended up winning. This year, it's all about the guy I call "String Man." William Close and his earth harp are already a million-dollar act. If you haven't seen him yet, go check it out on YouTube. This guy is incredible! His last performance on the show a couple weeks ago was, hands down, one of the best things I've seen on that show in a long, long time. He runs string from the stage up to the balcony of the theater, rosins up his hands, and plays the strings like a giant cello or something. It's amazing. In his last performance, he also brought in a singer and some crazy spinning drums to play a 90-second piece. They might as well have ended the show right then. I'm telling you. Look this guy up.
Ever heard the term "sweet chin music"? Well, let's talk about our homedog, Mr. Chad "Don't-Call-Me-Ochocinco" Johnson, who recently headbutted his wife after a, shall we say, domestic dispute. What a psycho! A headbutt?! I can't even imagine headbutting anyone for any reason, partly because I don't want to mess up my pretty little face, but secondly because that's like the FIFTH body part I would use to attack someone in a time of need. Fist, foot, knee, palm, teeth, fingernails, and then maybe head after that. So SEVENTH body part! Not even fifth. In that order, too. A headbutt, though? Really??
"Rock Band" is one of the greatest games ever created. It has provided hours and hours and hours of entertainment and fun for me and my siblings and also allows me to feel like I can play the drums. I always wanted to get a drum set or learn how to play the guitar, but "Rock Band" has allowed me to do so without having to spend that much time or money. Oh yeah. It's the best. Unlike other video games that are easy to sit and play alone, "Rock Band" encourages you to play in groups, which leads my family to believe that I have a social life. Thanks to an ever-increasing music library, I've been able to amass quite the collection of playable songs. So many, in fact, that Scott Aylett once referenced my love for the game as a large contributing factor to me not having a girlfriend. (It was worth it, dang it!) With that being said, the loss of our dearest Austin to a little thing called "marriage" has opened up a spot in the band. Let me know if you ever want to come over and play.
"Rock Band" is one of the greatest games ever created. It has provided hours and hours and hours of entertainment and fun for me and my siblings and also allows me to feel like I can play the drums. I always wanted to get a drum set or learn how to play the guitar, but "Rock Band" has allowed me to do so without having to spend that much time or money. Oh yeah. It's the best. Unlike other video games that are easy to sit and play alone, "Rock Band" encourages you to play in groups, which leads my family to believe that I have a social life. Thanks to an ever-increasing music library, I've been able to amass quite the collection of playable songs. So many, in fact, that Scott Aylett once referenced my love for the game as a large contributing factor to me not having a girlfriend. (It was worth it, dang it!) With that being said, the loss of our dearest Austin to a little thing called "marriage" has opened up a spot in the band. Let me know if you ever want to come over and play.
Ed Rothlisberger thinks Carly Rae Jeppsen sounds like a Mormon name. I suppose so. What is she? A General Authority? And, if you ask me, based on the lyrics and overall theme of her hugely-over-played hit, "Call Me Maybe," it sounds like she's a young, Mormon, college freshman living in Utah County that's desperate to get married. I've mentioned it before and I'll say it again - I don't think there are many girls out there that would ever just walk up to a guy and say "I just met you and this is crazy, but here's my number, so call me maybe." Not unless he looked like a Hollister model, anyway.
It's guest blogger time! When I'm talking about music, there's one name that comes to mind first - The Barbarian. Ah, yes. Jason the Barbarian, a long-time friend, lifelong college radio ally, and former host of "The Manly Show"! He knows a thing or two about music, so I felt like he'd be an appropriate man to enlist for this week's Issue. I just told him to talk about music and didn't give him many specifics, so we'll see what he came up with. Take it away, my friend!
"Well this is a first for me, guest blogging. I’ve been a fan of 'Signs of the Times' since way back in 2008, but I have never been honored as much as to be apart of it. Thank you, A-Town. Thank you. This moment will go down in my book of remembrance (and, of course, history). I’ll try not to screw it up.
So, the topic today is music? I like music. I think most people do. I’ve never really heard anyone say, 'ya know, I don’t really care for music.' If such a person ever existed they need to be firmly slapped on the wrist. Or not, I don’t really care. But something I’ve always found interesting was when you ask someone about themselves and they reply, 'I like music.' Dude, everyone 'likes' music, that doesn’t really tell me much about you. I think where the line is drawn for most people is what type of music you listen to, and for some that can be quite the thick line in the sand. To that, I say, there need not be a line.
Anyone who knows me will vouch to the fact that I listen to a very wide variety of musical genres. From the most heinous heavy metal to hip hop to jazz to classical and even the occasional Carly Rae Jepsen (go ahead, judge). This is something that has helped me bond with people from many walks of life throughout college and even my mission. One thing I can almost always be sure of is having a mutual musical interest with someone. Well, in fear of running on too long, I will sum up the point in my seemingly pointless post. You don’t need to write an anti-Justin Bieber comment on youtube. People like different things. The End. Oh and, long live WYLD STALLYNS!!"
So, the topic today is music? I like music. I think most people do. I’ve never really heard anyone say, 'ya know, I don’t really care for music.' If such a person ever existed they need to be firmly slapped on the wrist. Or not, I don’t really care. But something I’ve always found interesting was when you ask someone about themselves and they reply, 'I like music.' Dude, everyone 'likes' music, that doesn’t really tell me much about you. I think where the line is drawn for most people is what type of music you listen to, and for some that can be quite the thick line in the sand. To that, I say, there need not be a line.
Anyone who knows me will vouch to the fact that I listen to a very wide variety of musical genres. From the most heinous heavy metal to hip hop to jazz to classical and even the occasional Carly Rae Jepsen (go ahead, judge). This is something that has helped me bond with people from many walks of life throughout college and even my mission. One thing I can almost always be sure of is having a mutual musical interest with someone. Well, in fear of running on too long, I will sum up the point in my seemingly pointless post. You don’t need to write an anti-Justin Bieber comment on youtube. People like different things. The End. Oh and, long live WYLD STALLYNS!!"
- Jason "The Barbarian" Moffat
I can vouch for him. He's quite the music connoisseur, you might say. We had some great times together working at the KAGE down in Ephraim, most notably, our 15-minute pro wrestling match on the roof of the building that ended in the radio station completely exploding. It was glorious.
That's him. On the left. The Manliest Man of them all.
The Shoutout of the Week this week goes to Billy Joel and Elton John. They were my first concert of all time. Together. And I'm not sure I was totally old enough to really appreciate it. I wish I could go back and see that concert again. So... Thanks for a pretty good show, from what I can remember, gentlemen. I'm sorry for almost falling asleep during part of it. Please forgive me.
That's about it for this week, kiddos. I hope you're all having a lovely, lovely evening. Next week I'll post a quick blog while I'm packing my bags. I'm headed to Texas a week from tomorrow! Ah, I'm getting excited. Anyway, be excellent to each other... and... PARTY ON, DUDES!
Until next Time,
Move It! Sell It! And Leave the Door Open!
Aaron
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